Bez Berry

Queue Jumper

You've been waiting in your lane

For much too long and all in vain

I saw the red cross back a while

But I've queue jumped by half a mile

I smile and wave and gesture 'Howdy' 

From my 'tasteful', silver Audi

Loud and brashy. Built to win

I think it's time you let me in

You must have some room to spare

The gap you've left's a pubic hair

Width from the car that's just in front 

Don't shake your head and mouth out 'obscenities' 

I have the right to nip inside

I need more space. I can't abide

A driver who won't let me in

I'll win you with a cheeky grin

But still you keep me from your lane

The thoughts I have are quite profane

You push your tongue to bulge your cheek

Then shake your hand. I cannot speak

And you're a woman in no hurry 

Let me squeeze in.  What's the worry? 

Look - now I've reached a grinding halt

And it's all your stupid fault 

Why did I fork out sixty grand

To end up here in no man's land? 

And will my worries never cease? 

Here come the bloody highway police